“Dad”, “Daddy”, “Father”, “Pop”…it doesn’t matter what you call him. When that word comes up, you get a certain image in your mind. It could be good, but not always.
When we think of our mothers, we, for the most part, have kind of the same thoughts. Loving, nurturing, protective, always there. These are just a few words that most of us would use to describe mom. With dad, though, it’s all over the map, isn’t it? Tough, harsh, you’d have to know him, loving–just in his own way.
Moms tend to keep you from making mistakes. Dads tend to encourage you to make them. When you fall, moms bring you in, fix you up, and give you ice cream, while dads make you drag yourself up, brush you off (after rubbing a little more dirt on it), and send you back out there. Moms take care of you, dads make you take care of yourself.
Often, we don’t realize or really appreciate this until years later when we start to have children of our own. We respect him for teaching us to keep moving when things get tough. My father and I didn’t get along for years. I always though that we’d do ok if he would just make the effort to understand me better. In truth, it took me knowing him better for us to finally be closer.
Now that I have my own kids, I feel like I do, finally, know him a little better. My job is to help my kids grow into strong, confident, independent adults. For my son, in particular, I need to guide him and set the example of what it means to be a good father. Most dads wind up following in the footsteps of their fathers and, I believe that, in the long run, my father set a good one.
It was never about us getting what we wanted; it was about getting what we needed. He wasn’t always there when we wanted him, but he’d never fail to be there when we needed him. And he was always loving–just in his own way.
What do you think of when you think of your father? What kind of example did your father set? What did you call your dad? Leave me a comment and share your story.
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